The truth of God is known to us instinctively… Day #7 in the Book of Esther with Karen

Esther 2:10,11 “Esther had not revealed her nationality and family background, because Mordecai had forbidden her to do so. Every day he walked back and forth near the courtyard of the harem to find out how Esther was and what was happening to her.” Being taken to the palace didn’t just affect Esther, it changed Mordecai’s life also. Even though she was not his biological daughter, he had become her father, and she was his own dear child. Worry, concern, fear for her well being was now his life. His heart had to be breaking for her lost dreams, her changed future, his mind racing with concern over her state. She still lived very close, but worlds away. She was no longer under his roof or his protection, she was living in the palace of a capricious, pagan king who used women, and then discarded them. And so day after day he went, yes for news, but I have to believe for so much more. I personally think that while it doesn’t say Mordecai prayed, that as he walked back and forth, her name was being lifted to the One who could still see her, the One who could still protect her. I believe that moment by moment, day after day, Mordecai tearfully placed Esther’s life and future in the hands of the Father under whose roof she did still dwell. Prayer would have been the place where Mordecai could find rest. God’s Presence would have been the shelter for both he and Esther.

So this was the plan: bring in a whole lot of young women, let them spend one night with the king, and then let Xerxes choose which one he wanted for his queen. It sounds simple, but these were real people, real women. How many hearts were crushed in this process? How many of those women left feeling used and abused, broken, hurt, and wounded as they returned to the harem, never to be called again. They were then virtual prisoners in the harem, even though it was a beautiful place. Their lives were not their own. They belonged to a king who didn’t really care about them. Those women were treated like objects to just be thrown away. This was a plan, not a good plan, and the truth is it wounded Xerxes. Even though he was a pagan king, even though he didn’t acknowledge God in his activities, the truth of God is known to us instinctively. God created marriage. That was His plan. Xerxes, with his hundreds of concubines, living way outside of God’s best was left with all the repercussions of his hedonism. Sin marks us whether we acknowledge it or not, whether we’re the king or the poorest peasant in the realm. God gave the law for our protection, as a defense against evil. Living inside of it is not restrictive, but freeing, freedom from guilt, freedom from shame. But here is another truth. None of us has kept God’s law, oh, our sin may not be as blatant as Xerxes’, but it’s there, and we have been marked by its effects.

One more truth today. It is the very reason Jesus came. He lived the law perfectly. He kept it for all of us who couldn’t. Then He died and took the payment for all of our sin for us. With a word all of His perfection can be transferred to us. We simply ask. He is the King who really does care about us. Esther 2.

After I graduated from college, I was a little lost.. Day #49 in my journey to a Revolution

After I graduated from college, I was a little lost. I had broken up with a fiancé the semester prior so all my plans had changed. I didn’t have any jobs lined up so I moved back in with my parents. I searched for jobs in the area but was afraid to move away by myself.

I wanted to do something to stay busy while I was looking for jobs so I started volunteering at Bethel in the high school ministry. I helped lead worship, plan events and lead a small group.  The small group of girls was definitely a challenge for me. We met after youth group in the conference room, and I had no clue what I was doing. I tried to teach them things but I think in the end I learned the most.  They knew I was interested in Chris Weatherly and when we started dating I told them our goal not to kiss until marriage. Well, Chris and I failed on that one after 2 weeks of dating. So I had to admit it to my girls. The biggest lesson I learned was that I needed to be authentic. Those girls could see right through me and if I had lied I would have lost all credibility.  They thought it was funny and razzed me about it but it drew us closer as a group.

One thing I would try to incorporate in that small group of girls was to pray for each other. I would make a list of all the girls and pray for them every day. Today, even though it is ten years later, I want to pray for that group of girls.  My prayer is that God would move in their hearts and lives and reveal more of Himself. That they would experience His love and grace like never before.  Praying for you girls: Beki, Becca, Rachel, Sarah, Stacey, Jenny, Gretchen, Angie, Ivy, Ally and Abby. Thanks for the impact you had on my life.

A servant was her equal, a slave her friend… Day #6 in the Book of Esther with Karen

In Esther 2, many girls were brought to the palace and put under the care of Hegai. He had charge of the harem. Some commentaries suggest that there were upwards of a thousand young women, all with different personalities, various temperaments, and diverse backgrounds, but all vying for one thing, the crown. I wonder how hard this was, young women barking out commands, issuing demands, ordering him about. He was, after all, a servant; they were, after all, candidates for the highest female position in the land. And then there was Esther. The NIV says she pleased Hegai and won his favor, literally, she lifted up grace to him. In other words she spoke with kindness, honor, and respect to the man who served her. Esther’s heart was different. A servant was her equal, a slave her friend. Esther displayed God’s heart…grace.

Esther was a Jew in a Gentile world. Kosher wasn’t a word these Gentiles would have known or cared about. That was Esther’s world, her heritage, her life, but Mordecai had warned her to keep her identity a secret. It would be impossible for her, now basically a slave herself, to keep the Jewish laws while living in this pagan palace. Her food was brought to her. But God, who is so obviously at work even though not mentioned, miraculously provided. The grace and kindness that flowed out of Esther won her Hegai’s favor, and the Scripture says, he immediately provided her with special food. Immediately! God had not abandoned this little Jewish girl. His provision was right there. God took control of what Esther could not control. Hegai also provided her with beauty treatments, I think that’s code for a day at the spa. And then Hegai moved her and her maids into the penthouse, well, it says the best place in the harem. What I so love about this is that God was walking her through the darkness of these days one step at a time. His loving arms were wrapped firmly around her. Esther 2.

Your tears on my face… Day #48 in my journey to a Revolution

Be prepared for the mess. Life groups are not always easy. When you do life with others, be prepared to go through trials with each other. There are moments of good but there are also some very difficult times as well.

In all the small groups I have been in, I saw 4 couples that thought they were infertile get pregnant.  One couple in particular had given up hope and after 5 years resolved they wouldn’t get pregnant. Lo and behold they had a little baby girl 5 months ago that was a complete surprise. One guy who was divorced remarried and has a wonderful wife and little baby girl. Many many babies have been born. Job raises have occurred. The list could go on.

There have also been hard times, I have watched 4 couples struggle with infertility. I have witnessed numerous sets of multiples but also the loss of one. I saw another couple lose their son to cancer. In one small group, one guy’s step dad had committed suicide.  Another time a girl thought she was miscarrying during our group. One of the guys in my small group went through a horrible divorce. Another couple struggled financially and had to move away for a different job. The list could go on here too.

It makes my heart heavy just thinking about those times.

My pastor has said before that compassion means “your tears on my face.” I love that because almost the only way for that to happen is with a hug. I know some people feel like they have to have magic words to say in times of loss but ultimately our job is just to sit and be quiet.

It makes me think of the story of Job. The Bible says Job was blameless and upright. He was blessed with a lot of children and a lot of wealth. He had 7 sons and 3 daughters, and he owned 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 500 yoke of oxen and 500 donkeys and a large number of servants.  The Lord gives Satan the opportunity to attack him and Job loses everything. He loses in a matter of minutes his kids, his wealth and finally his health.  Even Job’s wife stops supporting him and tells him to “Curse God and die!” The scripture says in Job 2:10 “In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.”  What does Job do? He is sitting in a heap scraping at his open wounds. What do his friends do? Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar weep with him, tear their robes and sit on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. The Bible says, “No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.” They are a small group offering support to their friend.

I wish the story stopped there but Job is miserable and they start trying to give him reasons why everything happened. I believe the friends were trying to help but their reasoning was incorrect. How many times do we start talking and giving reasons for why people experience hard times?  What we need to do is offer hugs and just sit and be quiet. It is hard because we want to make sense of everything but in the end we don’t know the conversations of heaven just like Job didn’t know in Job chapters 1 and 2.

So as we experience the mess in life groups or other settings, our job is to do what it says in Romans 12:15 “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.” We don’t have to solve things just be a support.

How do we cope when what hasn’t been is now what we must embrace? Day #5 in the Book of Esther with Karen

Esther 2:1,”Later when the anger of King Xerxes had subsided, he remembered Vashti and what she had done and what he had decreed about her.”

Time had passed, his anger waned. Scholars say a war had taken place in between chapter 1 and chapter 2 of the Book, and the Persians didn’t fare well. So Xerxes came home in defeat and disgrace. Still King, still ruling, but a bit weaker, he needed someone to come home to and the palace was empty. Oh there were women, he had a harem full of women, but what he needed was a wife, a helpmate, a companion to share his life with. The Word of God spoken about Adam was still true of Xerxes, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” What I find interesting is that even with all the women at Xerxes disposal, and that is probably how he looked at these women in his harem, the truth was known to him. Xerxes was a pagan King, but he knew it, his attendants knew it. The Word of God is always true. It wasn’t good for the man to be alone. Xerxes needed a wife, a woman who would share the kingdom with him. And so a plan.

In the book of Esther, chapter 2, King Xerxes was lonely, he needed a queen by his side to rule his kingdom. Vashti was gone; his anger subsided. So his wise men suggested a beauty pageant of sorts. Let a search be made for the beautiful young women throughout the realm. Let them be brought into the kingdom and placed under the care of Hegai. Then the one who pleases the king can become the queen. Simple enough, easy, straight forward. It made sense to Xerxes, and it pleased him greatly. The order was given, the edict went out. The Scripture says many girls were brought. For some this was the opportunity of a lifetime. Some were probably lining up on the streets to be chosen for this. A chance at the top female position in the realm, the privilege of being the queen, who wouldn’t say yes? Who wouldn’t indeed.

A man named Mordecai, a Jew from the tribe of Benjamin, had adopted his cousin, Hadassah, also called Esther. He brought her up as his own dear child. She was lovely in form and features. Many girls were brought, but the Bible says about Esther, “and Esther also was taken”. She was taken. I seriously doubt that this was the life Hadassah would have chosen for herself, a young Jewish girl in the Harem of a Gentile King. Taken… taken. Life as she knew it, with all the Jewish laws about purity in her food, her drink, her life, was now over. In a moment her dreams, her plans for her future evaporated. She was not her own, she belonged to the King. Esther now lived in a harem.

What can we do when our world turns upside down, when suddenly unreality is the reality we live with? How do we cope when what hasn’t been is now what we must embrace, a sickness that the doctors say is terminal, an accident that changes life as we know it, the death of a loved one, circumstances that rock our world. This was now Esther’s life. We read about it in a few moments; she lived it. The stark reality of all this had to come crashing in on her as she awakened that first morning in these unfamiliar surroundings, her pillow wet from tears shed the night before. This pagan, gentile, foreign place was now her home. All that she knew in the past was gone, her cousin Mordecai’s laughter, his embrace when he came in at the end of the day, a simple supper shared in their humble, but sweet home. How many nights did she cry herself to sleep longing for her old life? How many days did she live with her eyes stinging from the tears she refused to shed in front of others? She lived in the palace, yes a beautiful enough place, but her freedom to come and go as she pleased was gone. Her ability to choose a suitor, or a beloved husband was out of her hands. Her fairy tale dreams of love and romance were left outside the palace gates. All those choices had just been made for her.

What can we do when the life that we now have is not the life that we’ve always known, and most certainly not the life we wish to know? We pray! We run, not walk to Him and find refuge in our Lord’s embrace. He was not left outside the palace gates like Mordecai. He walked into the place with Esther. And while the book of Esther doesn’t specifically mention prayer, Esther’s life spoke of it. What is said of her is that she lifted up grace to those around her, a grace that belied her circumstances, a grace that was greater than her own hurts and pain, the grace that comes from dwelling in the Presence of the True King. Esther 2.

Getting naked in life groups… Day #47 in my journey to a Revolution

Are life groups a perfect environment?  Absolutely not.  I have been in groups that have stopped because people stopped coming. I have been in groups where we had had to birth (which only means that some people break off to start a new group and others may follow).  I have been in groups where there is a lack of chemistry within the group.

It does take time to form friendships and it does require vulnerability on everyone who attends. The more vulnerable and real you are within the group then friendships are built. Patrick Lencioni writes in his book Getting Naked, “Without the willingness to be vulnerable, we will not build deep and lasting relationships in life. That’s because there is no better way to earn a person’s trust than by putting ourselves in a position of unprotected weakness and demonstrating that we believe they will support us.”

The other day I was talking about my education and I left out that after highschool I attended Liberty University a private Christian University in Lynchburg,VA. It was about 10 hours away from home so after my parents left there was no going home until Thanksgiving. There weren’t many people on campus for that first week because it was freshman orientation. I still remember taking some sort of freshman assessment test and talking with a girl named, Carol, afterwards. She invited me to go to the mall with her and I agreed. She and I didn’t know each other but our vulnerability made it possible.

It is so fascinating to me how vulnerable I was as a freshman but I think God purposely let me be that way to start friendships.  Carol and I were stuck at the hip pretty much all through college. She was my best friend. God provided such a great friend and it all started with vulnerability.

How about you? Are you holding back in your life group?  Are you unwilling to share what is really bothering you?

 

Can you legislate respect? – Day #4 in the Book of Esther with Karen

Xerxes asked his wisemen, “According to law, what must be done to Queen Vashti? She has not obeyed the command of King Xerxes.” The wisemen told Xerxes that not only did her decision affect him, it affected the rest of the kingdom as well. If nothing was done, then all those who heard about her actions would respond the same way. Disrespect, discord would abound. The answer? Let a royal decree be written, a law of the Medes and Persians which could not be repealed. Vashti would never again enter into the presence of King Xerxes. She would never again see his face, never again hear his voice. One decision, one act of disobedience and her life was never the same again. What happened to her? The Bible isn’t clear. Was she exiled to the farthest corner of the kingdom? Was it a death sentence? Did men come with a black shroud, cover her face, and take her to be executed to insure that never again would she look into the eyes of the king? We don’t know, but the punishment was swift and sure. We grieve for Vashti. We want someone to be her advocate, to come to her defense, to rescue her from this terrible fate.

A graphic picture, almost too graphic for our taste, the price of one act of disobedience. Adam and Eve disobeyed the command of God. It was one act, one sin, but the result was immediate. They could no longer walk in the Presence of God, they could no longer see His face, or hear his voice in the cool of the evening. Pain, suffering, thorns, thistles, exile from the Garden and death. Their decision didn’t just affect them, but the rest of the world as well. But the Good News is that an advocate has come, someone to rescue us from the terrible price of sin. His name is Jesus. Esther 1.

Well, Xerxes had Vashti exiled, or executed, either way she was never called before the king again. And then he sent out a decree that all the women in the realm would respect their husbands from the least to the greatest, and every man should be ruler of his own household. It’s interesting what we humans try to dictate. Obedience to law can be legislated and enforced, but respect is of the heart. It isn’t birthed out of law, but out of love. Oh, the outward appearance can look like respect, someone saying, “yes sir”, or bowing and scraping to another’s orders. But real respect, the kind of respect these men really wanted from their wives, begins with the husband truly loving his wife. Not orders or laws, but love, a love that treasures her, values her. When she looks in his eyes she sees wonder and awe that she would say yes to him. That kind of love breeds respect.

I heard a man say, “I don’t know what she wants from me.” I’ll let you in on a secret, what a woman truly wants is for her husband to love God with every fiber of his heart, soul and mind, and then to love her next. Women are overwhelmed with respect when a dad, with tears in his eyes, lays his big hand over the small, feverish brow of his child, falls to his knees and prays. Nothing makes a woman feel safer than a praying husband. Nothing makes him seem so large as when he humbles himself and asks God for answers. Respect grows when a man stands for integrity in the workplace, when his eyes dance with delight at her arrival, not when he glances at another. Respect is birthed, nurtured. If the “wise” men of Persia thought they could simply order respect, demand it, dictate it, they were wrong. The truth is that that approach made disrespect the real law. Esther 1, Ephesians 5.

Why do you think we fail at self-discipline? Day #46 in my journey to a Revolution

I was thinking about life groups yesterday and why I believe they are so necessary.

If you think of someone caught in a drug addicted lifestyle what is the best form of treatment? A recovery program that includes accountability from a group.  If someone wants to lose weight what is the most effective weight loss program?  Eat healthy, exercise and have a support group to hold you accountable.  I was discussing the weight loss issue with my mother in law not too long ago. She said the best way she has ever lost weight and kept it off is when she was connected to a team of people. They all lost weight together, held each other accountable and were motivated to keep it off because of how it affected everyone in the group. She said the focus was off of just her. It was a “we” mentality.

Why do you think we fail at self-discipline?  I think its because we will always give ourselves an out.  I experience that with exercise all the time. I go through a mental battle and get to a place where I just say thats okay for today. I don’t need to exercise this once.  Then today leads to tomorrow and the next day and the next.

I love that in life groups we get to the place where we can challenge and motivate each other in our journey’s towards Christ. I loved what my mother said about the focus was off of just her. It was a we. That’s also how I look at life groups. We are one unit working together towards a common goal. I know many of us want to serve in the local community but we make excuses for why we can’t or don’t. Life groups are a great way to hold us accountable to serving. We will be working as a “we” and everyone participates.  I was just looking at my churches “Life Group” blog and the most recent post is challenging groups to action.

This is what I found:

So we are asking all groups to pick one of the following four areas to serve on March 16th to get into the East End and Jacobsville communities.

School Projects: South Heights, Jefferson or Delaware

Most under-resourced neighborhoods have to expend a lot of energy in educational reform. But the East End and Jacobsville are blessed with three incredible Elementary schools that are laying the foundation of success for the kids in the community. We are simply going to go in and say, “How can we help,” by taking on spring-cleaning and other projects.

Neighborhood Clean Up or Maintenance: Community One, KEB

Community One’s mission is to create and maintain sustainable, low-income housing in our community by focusing resources on repair, weatherization and rehab projects that restore decent, affordable housing in under-served neighborhoods. We want to be in on that mission!

Park Projects: Jacobsville or East End

Through relationships and partnership with the Cities of Evansville and Henderson, we are going to go in and do basic landscaping and improvements to a couple city parks.

Community Projects: serving neighborhood partners e.g. Salvation Army, Dream Center, St. Vincent De Paul’s, Marsha’s Place

One of the things we’ve noticed through the Engage process, is that there are many quality organizations doing impact ministries in the neighborhoods already. We simply want to support and serve them.

 

What is your life group up to?  Are you supporting each other?

This was not a modern day marriage… Day #3 in the Book of Esther from Karen

Esther 1:10-12, “On the seventh day, when Xerxes was in high spirits from wine, he commanded the seven eunuchs who served him to bring before him Queen Vashti, wearing her royal crown, in order to display her beauty to the people and nobles, for she was lovely to look at. But when the attendants delivered the king’s command, Queen Vashti refused to come.”

She said, “No!” and to the king no less. This was not a modern day marriage, this was not a give and take relationship, theirs was not a love story made in Heaven. He was the King, she was his queen, his property. He wanted her to come and she said “No”. From history we know that Xerxes was not a man to be triffled with, he wasn’t kind or forgiving. He ruled with an iron fist.
We do not know Vashti’s reasoning. Was she too busy with her own affairs? Did she bristle at the command? She was, after all, his wife, how dare he command HER? Was his request too demeaning? Some scholars think that Xerxes meant she was to wear only her crown. Regardless, she refused, and what Vashti will discover is that that was the wrong answer. Xerxes was furious.

The Old Testament stories cast shadows of our relationship with God, but they are not exact portraits. Xerxes is a King, but he is a cruel King, not like the Heavenly Father. So what can we learn from this passage? God, our King, invites us to His banquet. His is not a command, but an invitation to fellowship with Him, enjoy His presence, feast at His table. We must come before Him naked in our sin, our own righteousness does not provide a covering. But He clothes us with Heavenly garments spun out of Jesus’ righteousness. He puts a crown of beauty on our heads, and He takes us as His bride. No matter what our excuses, this is the one invitation we do not want to refuse.

Xerxes was furious when Vashti refused to come to his banquet. He burned with anger. Now it was the custom for the king to consult experts on matters of law. So Xerxes called in his wise men. They were Xerxes’ cabinet, his counselors, the men closest to the king. They understood the times and were highest in the kingdom. These men had special access to the king. They weren’t the king, never would be the king, but their words moved the heart of a king. What set them apart from the rest of the kingdom? First of all, wisdom. They were wise men. Wisdom is not something we are born with, but neither does it necessarily come with age. Knowledge and experience can contribute to gaining wisdom. These men were probably well learned and had lots of life experience. But real wisdom comes from God and the Bible tells us there is a simple formula for attaining it… just ask. James 1:5 says that God generously gives wisdom when we come to Him and ask.

Xerxes’ wise men understood the times. We need to as well. We are living in a day when so much Scripture is being fulfilled, so we must pay attention. Israel became a nation May 14, 1948. Ezekiel 36, 37. Their people are coming home. Jeremiah 31. They are on the brink of war with Iran. Will this be the fulfillment of Ezekiel 38, 39? We don’t yet know, but understanding the times helps us to see God’s hand, our faith grows. we draw closer to Him, and we know better how to pray.

Xerxes’ men had special access to the king, they could approach the throne. Our King doesn’t sit on an earthly throne. Approaching Him is way beyond the protocol of Xerxes’ kingdom. But amazingly enough we can have special access to The King of all Kings. Jesus made the way. We can approach, speak, pour out our needs, intercede, and somehow, and believe me when I say I don’t know how this works, but somehow our prayers can move the heart of The King.

 

I have been talking about joining a life group and maybe you are thinking … Day #45 in my journey to a Revolution

For the past couple of days,  I have been talking about joining a life group and maybe some of you are thinking that would be great but my church doesn’t offer them.

Try looking around to see if any Bible studies are offered at your church or other local churches.  I attend a Women’s Bible Study offered at another church and there are numerous different churches represented. We typically have around 60-70 women attend. It is pretty neat because there are women of all ages from all different church backgrounds. The unifying factor is Jesus and studying the Bible together.  This year we have been in the Book of Acts but we have studied Revelation, John, Mark, and the life of Joseph over the past several years.

We do everything that is typical of a life group. We pray together, eat together, and study the Bible together. Because we sit at small tables, there are opportunities to deepen relationships with a handful of people as well.

Also, my mom and her sister teach the class and they do a fantastic job. They love studying the Bible and teaching it which is obvious in the Bible study.  I always think of this verse in Titus 2:3-5 “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children to be self controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands so that no one will malign the word.”

Today’s challenge is still to get in a life group or get in a Bible study. If we want a revolution, it starts with us.